Get OVER it, already.

Ok, so, this is gonna be a little bit of a rant.  All of the posts that I follow on Facebook....I find myself hiding more and more things everyday.  Even the stuff that I truly believe in, like being pro-choice and being pro-same sex marriage rights.  I am very liberal.  However, I think that there are just so many things that we should just get over.  If you are against abortion, don't have one.  Plain and simple.  I don't personally think an abortion should be something that you do over and over and use as birth control, because, let's face it....it's not birth control because there is already multiple forms of birth control available on the market for our use.  It's not like it was in the 50's and 60's where birth control and condoms weren't readily available.  However, it is not my choice to make.  I have made that choice. I was 19.  I was unemployed.  I lived with my mother.  The man that was the father was not a good anything.  He drank, a lot.  He put his hands on me, more than once.  So, why would I want to bring a child into that situation?  At any rate, it's not for me to say that someone else can't make that choice.  And it's not for you, either.  If you don't like it, that's fine, but, it's not up to you to make it illegal for someone else.  It's none of your business, so, get over it.  And all of these people out there mouthing off about gay marriage being against the Bible, or against God's law.  That book also says that it isn't for you to judge.  The bible says that the only judge is God, so, if they are sinning and are going against God's law, their judgement will be had on their day.  It's none of you business.  Get over it. A gay couple getting married WILL NOT, I repeat, WILL NOT affect your heterosexual marriage.  Also, the weapon of choice is Leviticus.  And that book, folks, is in the Old Testament.  Which has since been replaced with the New Testament.  The Old Testament is not supposed to be the way we live anymore.  Gay marriage is no different a civil right than removing the division between african americans and caucasian people.  It wasn't all that long ago that my best friend and I would never have met because she is half black.  She might never have been because her parents were an interracial couple....if there hadn't been a HUGE civil rights movement to remove that separation, my best friend might never have been born.  What I'm trying to say is that we are huge melting pot here in America if we would just melt a little.  We spend so much time hating each other's differences that we miss each other's wonderful similarities.  We are all HUMAN.  We all love.  We all bleed.  We all cry.  And we are all going to die.  Constantly fighting each other and spreading hate will only alienate us.  Hating someone because their skin isn't the same color, or because they are gay is like hating someone because they're tall....or blonde....or have green eyes.  None of these things are choices.  For all of you that think being gay is a choice, think about when you chose to be straight.  Oh, you can't pinpoint it?  Yeah, that's because it isn't a choice.So the moral of the story is, some people are gay.  Some people are straight.  Some people have brown skin.  Some people have peach skin.  Some people even have yellow skin.  Get over it.  Because if you did, you wouldn't have to hate so much and waste so much energy hating people and things that could care less if you do.  You are missing the person that could be your one true love, or your best friend.  You are missing things.  They are not.  Because while are you wasting your energy hating them, they are having wonderful lives with people that love them.

Get over it.  

Gearing up.

Ok, this one is gonna be lighthearted.  I just have to say that I cannot WAIT for summer.  I am psyched for shorts and swimming.  I have already picked out my new bathing suit, and, it is awesome if I do say so myself.  And, at only $30, it's a steal.  And it's from Walmart!  Who knew?  There is a link attached to Walmart, so you can check it out for yourselves!

 It comes in 2 solid colors and 2 super cute retro prints.  (I am going with the anchors.)It has a cute, fun, feminine ruffle on the top, a simple rectangular neckline, and ruching on the side.  I am sort of obsessed with things that remind me of days gone by.  However, I wouldn't say that I really fit into that, sort of, rock-a-billy/pin-up aesthetic.  I like it, but, only in little bits and bobs. (at least for my personal wearing pleasure, I LOVE to look at girls all decked out in the pin-up style.)  I am also obsessed with dresses in the summer, because let's face it...sometimes you need to air out the cookie.  So, a new site that I have discovered is eShakti .  This site offers SO many customizations that it will blow your mind.  They have extended sizing, length options, and sleeve options.  The prices aren't ridiculous either.  It is a little pricey, but, it is reasonable for a dress in a plus size.  The tops are a little more heavily priced, but, still very good selection.  Everything has a little bit of a June Cleaver flavor, so, if you are into that sort of thing, this is the site for you.  Old Navy has a great selection of plus sized apparel, and H&M is good for trendy plus sized clothes.  Target is also getting in the plus sized groove with their new selections.  Some of which are both a great deal, and, really cute and on trend.  So many stores are finally realizing that we fat women actually have fashion sense.  We do actually prefer clothes that have a shape...and we don't sit around the house all day in Mu-Mus.  Another store that offers cute deals is Forever 21.  They also have a plus size line now!   So, go forth and shop, my lovelies!  I wanna see those legs!  Summer is here.  Let em have it!

Grow Up.

Ok, I'm gonna bitch for a minute.  I am sick and tired of seeing people complaining about how much debt you're going to be in to go to college.

Having said that, the interest rates are ridiculous and there should be more regulation on it.  For instance, I have a Sallie Mae loan for one class.  I borrowed $2,000 for the class.  When it is finally paid for it's going to cost me twice that to pay it off.  That's just one class.  Also, because they aren't really federally regulated student loans....there is no cap on the interest they can charge AND they can change the interest rate whenever they want without telling me. So,essentially, a small $2,000 loan could end up costing whatever Sallie Mae wants to collect on it.

Do I think that the cost of an education is ridiculous?  Yes.  Do I think that the interests rates should be ridiculously low so that EVERYONE can go back to school?  Yes.  Do I think that people that make the choice to go back to college should have some accountability for that decision?  Yes.  There is no such thing as a free-ride for a college education unless you are an insanely talented athlete or a super genius, which, most of us aren't.  So, have some friggin' accountability.  If you don't take the time to shop around and find the best rate on the best terms, THAT'S YOUR BAD.

So, should college be cheaper, thereby making it more accessible to everyone, thus creating a more viable workforce?  Absolutely.  Should we, as adults, not have to have any responsibility for the choices WE make?  No.  I am 31, and my education is important because I want a better future for myself and my son.  It is also going to be very expensive.  However, I knew it was going to be expensive BEFORE I signed the paperwork.  If you don't understand most of your financing, you probably shouldn't go to college.

That is all.

Just. Stop.

Hello all.  

Okay, so, here is something that has been on my mind a lot lately.  It has also been in the press a lot lately.  This is the issue of shaming other people.  Most recently, it has been in the media because of the CEO of Abercrombie and Fitch.  He doesn't want people that are "uncool" to shop in his stores.  He also doesn't offer plus size clothing options, because, obviously we fat chicks are uncool.  I could say that it doesn't matter to me because his face looks like his neck threw up.  However, that would be in direct opposition to my point.  

I think that our biggest goal in life should not be to look like a model, or a celebrity.  It should be to look like "that" girl.  That girl that I want to know.  That girl behind the glasses has a story.  She is going to be the president, or a doctor, or a famous musician and you will never have known her because she's "uncool."  That guy that sits alone at lunch, he's going to be our next great novelist, or and extraordinary artist or an amazing CEO.  Just because he's quiet and a loner, you will never know how amazing he is.  I wasn't raised that way.  I was raised in a home that was extraordinarily loving.  I was never put down or told that I was too fat, or too plain.  I was told everyday that I was smart.  That I was beautiful.  That I was funny.  I am trying to teach my child these values.  We live in a society that tells us that fat is ugly.  Books are uncool.  It isn't hip to dance to the beat of your own drum.  When I was in high school, where the Mean Girls/Boys live most often, I had at least one friend from every single clique-y group you could think of.  Most of my favorite friends are still my friends, and, guess what?  They aren't any different.  They are still the quirky bunch of cooks that I chose for my friends all those years ago.  And you know what else, they are all beautiful for their own various reasons.  They have all become more wonderful versions of themselves.  

I think that is what true beauty is.  It is all well and good to have a pretty face to look at, or, a great figure to make others swoon, but, it's all for nothing if you're an ugly person inside.  If you make yourself feel better by tearing someone else down, then it doesn't matter how pretty your face is.  Alienating others won't make you better.  For me, as a woman, I think it is very important for all of us to stick together more than we do.  There just doesn't seem to a sense of solidarity among women.  We view each other as competition instead of equals.  I think that we should all stop shaming each other, but, my biggest problem is between us women.  We are all beautiful in our own way.  Fat, thin, short, tall, brown, black, white, or blue.  Even women that weren't born women.  Stop fighting with each other.  Stop tearing each other down.  Be proud of what you are and don't look to others for what you aren't.  I am smart.  I am funny.  I am a good mother.  I am a hard working student.  I am honest.  I am not a size 2.  I will never be.  I am happy with the gray in my hair and the wrinkles by eyes.  I am happy in the knowledge that I love and am loved.  I do not concern my daily outlook on life on whether I can wear an overpriced pair of shorts, or, shop at the "trendy" stores.  I am me, not perfect, but, glad to have what I have.  Frankly, if I have $20 in my pocket, you can find me at the thrift shop, and, not the high priced trend store.  

That's all for now.  

Be kind to each other.  That person you said that nastiness about is a person just like you.